10,000 B.C.

Rating*

10000bc

10,000% Bull-Crap! Apocalypto for morons! Roland Emmerich is simply a terrible writer and a mediocre director. As usual he steals ideas from Steven Spielberg, and Peter Jackson. Yet filtered through Emmerich in this recycled form, everything is just ……rubbish and pointless. If you’ve seen the trailer then you’ve seen all the mildly entertaining moments. Throughout the film we cut back to “Old Mother” (who reminded my of ‘Boob Lady’ from The Simpsons Movie) as she reacts to the heroes quest. e.g. when they are stuck in the snow, she shivers. I wish we could have seen her clucking and prancing like a chicken during the stupid giant bird attack. At best 10,000 BC showcases some nice visual effects. But even these are inconsistent; the opening of the film features some terrible green screen work. As I left the screening room I saw a little boy fall to the ground weeping. I choose to believe it’s because he wasted all his pocket money buying a ticket to see this shite. For the record, I have a Cineworld pass, so I did not.

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~ by thewholebuffalo on July 9, 2009.

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